Why the Holidays Hit So Hard and How to Protect Your Mental Health

Why the Holidays Hit So Hard and How to Protect Your Mental Health

The holidays should be a time for rest and reestablishing relationships. For a great many people, however, this period is the most difficult of the year when it comes to their mental health. The season involves shorter days, full schedules, financial strain and complicated family situations all at the same time, and these pressures have the greatest effect on those who were already having troubles.

The first thing you need to do in order to get through this time of year in better form is to understand why it is so difficult.

When routine falls away

It is not until your daily routine is gone that most people realise how much it has supported them; during the holidays offices either close or work on reduced hours, appointments are postponed in order to go on travel, and the evenings are filled with all sorts of events. Sleep becomes irregular and meals take place at unusual times with alcohol appearing at almost every gathering.

Sarah Couture, who is the Clinical Director at the Rubicon Mental Health center, says that based on her clinical experience the holidays are not so much about a single major trigger as they are about a quiet disappearance of structure," and that for a person dealing with a substance use disorder or a mental health condition this situation has an added impact.

Individually, these changes may appear to be minor. Yet as a whole they eliminate a great many of the habits which enable people to detect early warning signs and to remain steady.

Expectations versus reality

There is also a clear idea about how things should feel during the holidays: happy, united, and thankful. If real life does not live up to this image, people usually think that they are failing at something while everyone else appears to cope with it effortlessly.

For certain people the season serves as a reminder of those who are now gone, of relationships that are tenuous, or of a year which didn't turn out as hoped. Other people spend the holidays mostly by themselves while all those around them seem to be celebrating. The disparity between what is expected and what actually happens can therefore increase feelings of loneliness, guilt and low mood.

Financial pressure and the risk of crisis

Money is a very common cause of stress around the holidays, since gifts, travel, the cost of hosting and higher winter bills all come during the same few weeks. In families that have a small financial buffer, a single misfortune can make all the difference.

Allison Eischer, who is the Marketing Manager at Mel Trotter Ministries, points out that every winter we come across neighbours who had never thought that they would have to ask for assistance. A layoff, a health problem or a mental health crisis can occur at an unfortunate time and then suddenly the rent can't be paid.

Financial difficulties and mental health influence one another; worries regarding money can make anxiety and depression worse and a mental health problem can make it more difficult to keep a job or to keep up with one's bills. Moreover, during the colder months the effects of falling behind become more urgent.

Why acting early matters

Both experts agree: reaching out early provides more options.

For mental health, planning ahead is more effective than reacting. Keeping appointments, preparing for challenging gatherings, and confiding in a trusted person can help. "Asking for more support in December isn't a setback," Couture says.

The same approach applies to practical needs. "The most important work often happens before someone loses their home," Eischer says, "when help with a bill, a job lead or a connection to care can keep a family housed through the season."

How to support yourself and others

A few simple steps can make the season easier to manage:

Stay stick to your routine. It's important to keep your sleeping times, mealtimes and appointments as regular as you can, even if your plans do change.

Set limits. It's fine to leave early, skip an event or keep a gathering short if it's more than you can handle.

Be careful about the way you consume alcohol; during holiday events drinking is made easy and this can have a negative effect on your mood and on your sleep.

Keep an eye on people who stop contacting you. If someone is pulling away from plans it could be because they are having difficulties. A straightforward message, given with only light pressure, can help to get them to open up.

It's best to ask for help before the situation gets out of hand; that is when treatment providers and community organisations can make the greatest difference.

The bottom line

It is not necessary for the holidays to become a crisis. It is common to experience difficult emotions during this time, and this does not mean that one is failing as a person. By making plans in advance, remaining connected with others, and asking for support early on, people have many more possibilities than if they had to go through a crisis.

Frequently Asked Questions

Why do the holidays have such a big effect on mental health?

Multiple pressures often coincide during the holidays, including disrupted routines, irregular sleep, increased alcohol use, financial strain, family tension, and shorter days. While manageable individually, together they can undermine the habits that support mental well-being.

Is it ordinary to feel sad or anxious during the holiday period?

Yes. Many people feel stress, loneliness, or low mood during the holidays, especially if they are grieving, alone, or facing financial concerns. These feelings are normal and do not reflect personal failure.

At what point should holiday stress be given more serious consideration?

If low mood, anxiety, or changes in drinking, sleep, or eating persist for weeks or disrupt your work, relationships, or daily life, consider consulting a doctor or mental health professional. They can help identify the cause and recommend support.